


Under a Starlit Sky

by chibi_nightowl



Category: Batman (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Jason gets his zen on, M/M, Meditation, Mental Drifting, Swimming, Therapy (of sorts), Vulnerability
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-04
Updated: 2018-08-04
Packaged: 2019-06-21 22:51:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15568107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chibi_nightowl/pseuds/chibi_nightowl
Summary: “Does it work?” Dick asked, gaze flicking to the open water and back to Jason.“Does what work?”“That,” Dick said, gesturing at the pool. “Just…drifting.” There was a wistful note in his voice, one that made Jason remember that he wasn’t the only one who’d had a lifetime of shit and misery to deal with.





	Under a Starlit Sky

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a recent conversation with my friend Janna... :)

The water in the swimming pool lapped gently at Jason’s bare skin as he lay there on the surface, staring up through the open skylights at the stars above. Here in Gotham, this was the closest he could get to finding the same sense of serenity he’d found back on the island with Kory and Roy. Out there, surrounded by the sea, the sand, and the night sky, Jason had finally found a way to calm his demons. Not purge them entirely, no, that wasn’t ever going to happen, but floating in the warm embrace of the water, contemplating the stars and the infinite void of space gave him a perspective on things, that out there somewhere, there was another being whose life had to suck more than his. 

When he felt the itch beneath his skin, reminding him that nothing he did was ever good enough, that _he_ wasn’t good enough, he came here to the penthouse at the top of Wayne Tower to make use of the massive swimming pool that no one ever used and yet was still meticulously maintained for appearances. At first, he snuck in, having created a diversion for his former family that would keep them busy for a couple hours so he could reclaim what passed as his inner peace. He’d tried other places before, but they were too open, too public. Up here, he was still surrounded by walls of bulletproof glass and some of the best security systems known to man. 

He needed that sense of security, of protection. Not quite someone watching over him, but rather, knowing that someone would be here in a flash if he were to come under attack. Back with Roy and Kory, it had been enough to know his best friends were there, the fact that one of them was a superpowered alien princess who was also one of the finest warriors in the universe helped soothe his nerves. Here, Jason knew that if a mouse so much as farted where it wasn’t supposed to, the security system would soon have a Bat coming to check up on things. 

It wasn’t the same, not by a long shot, but it helped. 

So Jason floated in the pool, drifting here and there with the flick of a hand or foot, staring up at the sky. He missed how clear and bright the Milky Way appeared when there was no light pollution to distort it. Some nights he’d come up here only to find no stars visible at all, the view blocked by a thin layer of clouds and the yellow glow of the city lights reflecting off them. In a way, it had its own charm and Jason’s thoughts would instead drift downwards to the city below, imagining he could feel the pulse of Gotham’s heart beating through each and every one of them, if only they knew how to listen. 

Tonight though, the sky was clear and Jason could pick out familiar stars and constellations. His mind provided images of other stars, a couple of which he’d traveled to. 

Wasn’t that a kick in the pants? A Gotham street rat who’d traveled amongst the stars in an alien spaceship and having the kind of adventures that Edgar Rice Burroughs could only dream of. Perhaps he should take pen to paper and make a record of his travels, changing only the names to protect the so-called innocent. The thought amused him, and he smiled softly, kicking slightly to keep himself in the center of the pool. 

Jason ducked his head fully under the water momentarily. If he was at the point where he could smile again, it was time to leave. The water and the sky had done their jobs and he was feeling more comfortable in his skin again. 

He drew a deep breath and fully submersed himself, drifting in complete weightlessness and utter silence, the last of his tension releasing itself into the water. 

Resurfacing, Jason shook his head, sending droplets of water flying every which way. He started swimming towards the side of the pool, his powerful body slicing through the water with practiced strokes. 

So lost in his own head that Jason didn’t notice the toes of boots on the edge of the pool until he was almost right on top of them. Rearing back, he startled, treading water as he spotted Dick standing there in his Nightwing uniform, sans the mask. 

Dick, the brother who he shared a most definite unbrotherly relationship. To this day, Jason wasn’t certain what they were exactly, but it worked for them. 

“What are you doing here?” Jason asked quietly. He wasn’t upset per se, but this time was _his_ and not something he’d ever shared with anyone who had grown up in the Batcave. 

“Checking on you,” Dick replied neutrally. “You were floating for longer than usual.” 

Jason snorted and ducked back under the water. Of fucking course his little sanctuary wasn’t quite as private as he thought. Rising again, he wiped away the water in his eyes. “How long?” 

Dick shrugged. “We all know you break in here sometimes, but since there’s never any damage, Bruce lets it slide.” 

“I don’t break everything I touch,” Jason snapped. The words had struck a nerve that was always open and raw. He knew better than to believe he would ever have a happily ever after, but he’d at least thought Dick believed in him somewhat. 

“I didn’t say you did,” the other man replied, kneeling gracefully so that he was on a more even level with Jason. “In case you missed it, I said I was here to check on you; not tell you to leave.” 

Privately, Jason could admit he’d glossed over that part. It was still an odd feeling to have someone looking out for him because they cared rather than because they expected something out it. Roy, Kory, Dick, hell, even the Pretender to an extent. His mind shied away from Alfred. That still hurt too much to think about. 

“Well, I’m just fine and dandy, so unless you want a show, go fly away and bother someone else.” Jason grabbed the side of the pool and hoisted himself up, water streaming down his bare body. He never wore a swimsuit when he did this. Part of what helped soothe the raw parts of his psyche, of his soul, was removing all barriers so he could feel the ebb and flow of the water over his skin. There was something meditative and entirely sensual about it, but damn if he would admit that to Dick now. 

Dick rose and stepped aside but didn’t leave, openly gazing at Jason’s naked body, probably checking him over for injuries that for once he didn’t have. 

No, those were all on the inside tonight. 

“Does it work?” Dick asked, gaze flicking to the open water and back to Jason. 

“Does what work?” Jason strode over to his pile of clothes and body armor. His t-shirt acted as a towel more often than not and tonight was no exception. 

“That,” Dick said, gesturing at the pool. “Just…drifting.” There was a wistful note in his voice, one that made Jason remember that he wasn’t the only one who’d had a lifetime of shit and misery to deal with. 

“It helps me,” he replied, pulling on his briefs. 

Dick contemplated the water while Jason dressed. “How does it work when it leaves you so open and vulnerable?” 

Ah, there was the heart of it. The part Jason himself had the hardest time accepting. “When I started doing this a few years ago, Roy and Kory were there with me. Just close enough to hear me if I shouted. Here…,” this part hurt to admit, but Dick needed to know so that he’d understand. “Here, I know that if something happens, a shout will have all of you scrambling your asses to help me.” 

That made Dick crack a small smile. “So you do trust us.” 

“No, I trust that Bruce doesn’t want to deal with the property damage and media attention that follows if something happened up here.” 

The small smile blossomed into the familiar Dick Grayson grin that had wormed its way into Jason’s frosty heart to take root. “It’s a start.” 

Dick peeled off his gloves and dropped them on the pool deck, then started removing the rest of his uniform until he was the one as bare as the day he was born standing there next to a fully dressed Jason. It was a vulnerable position the man was putting himself in, but if there was one thing Jason knew for certain about his brother, it was that his trust in people occasionally overrode his common sense. 

In this case though, it wasn’t misplaced. 

Vivid blue eyes glanced over at him. “Will you stay?” Dick asked softly. 

Jason grabbed the back of Dick’s head, tangling his fingers in the windblown hair, and pressed their foreheads together. This close, he could feel the faster respirations of Dick’s breathing that revealed how on edge he really was. “Yeah,” he whispered, pressing a brief kiss onto Dick’s lips. “I’ll stay for as long as you need.”


End file.
